54 Below. September 27th. 2014. Been waiting all year for something special and this is it. They got the band back together. Tony Danza talking to Matt Saldivar at the bar. The room buzzing with excitement.
All I need is a good cigar and dedicated ventilation and I would have been as near to nirvana as I can get without my wife being next to me. 54 Below is opulent without pretensions. Festive like a secure speak easy of old. Pete Peterson (the drummer) is missing. Not the reason they have not played! They have not played because Mrs. Peterson had a baby. Julio got the baby sitter. Julio is "so tired.” Here is the blow by blow of this 11 round bout of non-stop laughter in a club featuring an audience with the likes of C. Michael Hall, Ben Shenkman, and James Naughton.
1. Throw Away the Past (Move On)
They all wipe with towels. Mr. Peterson is looking for Julio to set up the baby monitor. They are playing Frankenstein? No, it’s just like a radio. You have to tune it! Baby sleeping.
"It’s like my heart is walking around outside of my body." Mr. Peterson explains parenthood...but with not so fond memories of the blessed event! Trauma down there! Alien! Coming out of your body.
Mrs. Peterson wants to get naked and do shots! Mr. P can't do it. Yet...
2.(Get Wet) Down There!
Father Tom's sexual history. Father Tom was not visited by a priest.
3. Because, Because ! We were in Love!!!
Julio cries. And is really, really tired. Ricky (He's the new drummer) had to pump.
Dios Mio! It's been 10 months and they have not named the baby!
Lazy drunk absentee mom. Mrs. Peterson is a feminist. WWDRD
4. (New song) What Would Donna Reed Do?
5. Matt Saldivar! No matter where you are...we think of you and smile!
More patter. More tired-ness.
Beef jerky? Fruit roll up? "Is that my placenta?" Mrs. Peterson asks. Eating smoked placenta for energy!
Tony Danza comes on stage. He is the baby sitter! He's good with kids. Julio explains the long running documentary (Who's the Boss) about raising kids.
Tony does a song!
6. Donna was an extreme sunbather in Vegas...who died of exposure...2nd chance. “I couldn't have been rotten-er...I should have gotten her out of the sun!" (He rocks it out of the park!) A song from Honeymoon in Vegas coming to Broadway.
Mrs. Peterson is hot, hot, hot for Tony.
Mr. Peterson's wilted libido shows signs of life! (He's jealous).
7. Arwen- Aragorn-Misfits
Mr. Peterson wants to fight Tony Danza!
8.Bruce Lee! I gotta be!
He's calling Tony Danza out! Baby monitor going off! Baby crying.
Let's sing him a lullaby.
9. $60.00 Dollar Bra (sotto voce)
Puts the baby to sleep. Matt (aka Julio) played the lil piano! Cracked me up!
Naming the baby after Tony Danza.
10. Michael Corleone-Apollonia… Blow Up-in a car. "You could be grotesquely obese and I'd still love you" Mr. Peterson croons.
11...Encore! Matt Saldivar! New song? Johnny Loves You? Evans solo sweet. All -I-Know ...is I don't wanna lose you now...
Whew. I am so tired after that recap. I think I need a nap...later. What a great night. I hope they play more.